Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
