My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
How does it feel to date your dad?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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