the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Randomize
