I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
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