Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
