i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize