Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
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