I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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