I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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