Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
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