I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
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