i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
