is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize