Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
