I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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