we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize
