Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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