One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
