He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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