Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
