we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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