Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize