It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
i've created a new STD.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
