So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
what is it with giant penises always finding me
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
