Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
