Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
