You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I want to fling myself into the sun
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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