all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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