i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
