my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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