does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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