You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
