This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Mom said you looked used
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Randomize