did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
