take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Randomize
