Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize