gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
