He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
