I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
