I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
God, I missed his penis.
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