check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
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