Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
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