Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
