Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
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