i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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