i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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