R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
