Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
