i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize