Just fell off a train. Bad.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize